🌾 Starting From Scratch: When Mold, Moments, and the Mind Collide

There’s something about rotten fruit that feels symbolic. One bad piece and suddenly the entire bag is lost.

Today, that looked like tossing out fruit meant for simmer blends and admitting defeat for now. Goodbye fruit for simmers. Starting from scratch.

And honestly, it felt like the final straw after weeks that have been emotionally heavy.

Not long after, an email arrived. One of those emails that holds opportunity in one hand and stress in the other. The kind that stretches you while simultaneously tightening your chest. For me, stress doesn’t show up quietly. It opens the door to anxiety, paranoia, depression. A whole negative world that feels consuming if I’m not careful.

When I reach that place, I turn inward. I get quiet. I ask myself questions most people never hear out loud. I pull back, not because I don’t care, but because I’m trying to survive my own thoughts. I know that silence can come across as distant or off-putting, but it’s how I regulate. How I ground myself when my mind feels like an enemy more days than not.

This is the part people don’t always see.

When things don’t work out, I try to catch myself before spiraling into why is this happening to me? Instead, I gently shift the question to something that offers growth instead of bitterness:

What is this trying to teach me?

That reframing doesn’t magically fix everything, but sometimes it opens a window. A breath of air. A little light.

This blog post has lived in my drafts for over a week. Maybe longer. Waiting. I’ve reread it countless times. Hovered over save. Closed the app. Walked away. Came back. I didn’t have the courage to post it. To make these feelings real. To be seen in this space.

But Wildflower Expressions has never been about perfection.

It’s about starting again when things spoil. About honoring the messy middle. About choosing growth over forcing something that no longer feels aligned. About allowing yourself to begin again without shame.

So here it is.

Heartfelt. Emotional. Honest.

Still learning. Still healing. Still flowing.

This is me, showing up imperfectly and choosing to share anyway. And today, that is enough.

Wildflower Expressions