Healing Isn’t an Aesthetic — It’s an Alchemy

🌺A Wildflower Expressions Blog

Healing has become something people feel strangely entitled to evaluate. As if there’s a correct pace. A socially acceptable presentation. A quiet, humble version that doesn’t take up space or shimmer too loudly.

But healing was never meant to be performed for approval.

It’s an internal process — and it belongs solely to the person doing the work.

I read a post recently that offended me, and for a moment I couldn’t understand why. Instead of reacting, I did what healing has taught me to do: I turned inward. I journaled. I followed the emotion instead of silencing it. That’s when I realized the discomfort didn’t come from the words themselves — it came from what they brushed against inside me.

I’m living far outside my comfort zone right now.

I am not naturally someone who wants to be seen. I’ve always preferred the shadows — the quiet places where roots grow unseen. Visibility feels vulnerable. Exposure feels risky. And yet, the universe — God — keeps nudging me forward, whispering, you don’t grow in hiding.

Growth requires friction. Purpose demands courage. Healing doesn’t ask us to be comfortable — it asks us to be honest.

If what I’m doing gets labeled a “healing aesthetic,” so be it.

Because healing, at its core, is transmutation.

Transmutation is the sacred act of taking dense, heavy energy — grief, jealousy, rage, abandonment, fear — and transforming it into something usable. Something creative. Something alive. You don’t bypass pain to heal; you move through it. You sit with it. You metabolize it. You let it change form.

This is basic energetic law — not just spirituality, but physics. Energy cannot be destroyed; it can only change states. When someone channels their pain into art, purpose, business, community, or love, they are not “aestheticizing” healing — they are practicing it.

What’s often misunderstood is the belief that healing is linear. That someone who appears quieter, humbler, or more reserved must be “further along.” That someone expressive, visible, or creative must be compensating or pretending.

That assumption is false.

No one has the authority to rank another person’s healing journey. There is no energetic hierarchy. No spiritual scoreboard. No finish line where one person stands superior to another.

Someone can be deeply healed and still expressive. Someone can be calm and still avoidant. Someone can be joyful and still processing grief. Someone can be building loudly while doing the most honest inner work of their life.

You cannot measure depth by surface.

Often, judgment comes from comparison — and comparison is a misunderstanding of energy. When we assume we are further ahead than someone else, we place ourselves in false authority over their experience. That’s not wisdom — that’s ego dressed up as enlightenment.

True healing doesn’t look down.

It doesn’t keep score.

It doesn’t need to critique how others survive.

For me, healing has meant learning how to alchemize emotion instead of suppressing it. When jealousy, anger, or judgment shows up — I don’t project it outward anymore. I ask it what it’s trying to teach me. I turn it into fuel. I turn it into creativity. I turn it into something that builds instead of burns.

That is not avoidance.

That is mastery.

And part of that mastery is learning when not to be bothered. Other people’s opinions are theirs to hold. Their assumptions are not my responsibility to dismantle. I don’t need to shrink my purpose to soothe someone else’s discomfort with visibility.

I’ll keep living out loud — not because it’s easy, but because it’s honest.

I’ll keep choosing purpose over hiding.

I’ll keep blooming in ways that make sense for me.

We are all here learning.

We are all here healing.

And no one gets to decide what that should look like for anyone else.

Wildflowers don’t compete. They don’t rank. They don’t explain themselves.

They just bloom — wherever they’re planted 🌿